One of my most recent articles here at was entitled Bad Advice and This Month in Glamour: ‘Let The Sex Games Begin’. I had a good old rant about how terrible the sex advice given to women in glossy magazines is, but as I finished it I was left with a resounding feeling that I hadn't gone far enough.

Because it’s not just magazines, is it? There’s very little good sex advice anywhere, at least not for people like most of us reading this. The best-known “sex expert” in the UK is probably Tracey Cox, who has her own line of sex toys that are actually quite good, but she has some dubious opinions about whatever she thinks "promiscuity" is, among other things. Our most popular left-wing newspaper has its own sex advice column, but they’re hardly going to print a letter from someone who is conflicted about their age play fantasies or who wants some advice for having better anal sex.

The modern world is chock full of people whose orientations, lifestyle choices and relationship configurations are non-standard and non-traditional, but we’re suffering from a dearth of places for those people to go for personalised advice. Local communities are great, but not everyone has people they feel able to take these things to. The ease of internet searching has made it much easier to find the answers to your questions in a vacuum, but sometimes that’s no replacement for being able to explain your own problem in your own words to someone who is invested in individualising their answers. The resources for this pretty much aren't out there, and it simply isn't good enough.

I have a friend who says he tries never to criticise anyone unless he thinks he could do a better job. In honour of this idea, we’re starting an advice column here: I’ll be taking your questions about love, lust, sex, kink and relationships and giving you the best inclusive and sex-positive advice I can. 

If you have a question that you’d like answered—perhaps one that you've not had a lot of luck with elsewhere—I’d be only too pleased to handle it for you. I've been in this game a fair while now, and it’s about time I put some of that experience to better use.  Just send your questions to [email protected].


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