The holidays are on its way, and we are about to be inundated with serious sales! The good news is – these offers include sex toys! All your favourite shops will be selling toys at seriously low prices, and it is the perfect opportunity to try out something new! If you happen to be in a relationship this holiday season – it is also the perfect time to learn how to buy sex toys together!'s Holiday Guide for

How to Buy Sex Toys WITH Your Partner

Some people might suggest that you surprise your partner with a gift, but we would recommend otherwise. If your partner has a very specific wish list of sex toys that they have already approved of, then go for it. If your partner does not have a very specific wish list, then you should not purchase one for them. Instead, you should purchase one with them. You never want to assume what your partner will or will not like and put the pressure on them to feign interest in something you thought might be cool.  Instead, we have some tips for how to go shopping together as a couple. Yay!

1. Talk About It!

If you haven’t used sex toys together before, then you should definitely discuss the possibility and sort out any possible insecurities that might go along with that topic. It is totally okay not to use sex toys, but it should be discussed as they can make a great addition to the bedroom. You need to make sure that your partner is comfortable with the idea of using a toy. If not, explore the reasons in a gentle way but never push for it if your partner has said no. This can also be applied to partners that have used certain toys before but might want to try something new. Just because someone has one type of toy, doesn’t mean they want another kind. Shopping for sex toys should be comfortable for both people involved.  

2. Decide What You’re Looking For

If you agree to introduce sex toys into your relationship or to introduce a new type of toy, then you need to decide which type you are looking for. There are so many out there, which is the best part! Do you want to start off with some handcuffs you may have read about? Do you want a toy designed for penetration or focused on vibrations or both? Do you want to try some anal play? There are more categories of sex toys out there than you might think, so you might want to decide what you’re looking for before you actually start looking. It will cut down on feeling overwhelmed when you see how many choices there are online.



3. Shop Together

Once you’ve narrowed down your selection a little bit, it is time to start shopping for what you want!

  • You can start by browsing online stores. There are often pages dedicated to ‘most popular toys’, which can be a good place to start. If you aren’t entirely sure if you like the features of a particular toy, then you can search online for some sex toy reviews. Yes, this is really a thing! There are a bunch of bloggers out there that review sex toys and will go over every aspect of a toy, including what worked and what didn’t work. Of course, each will prefer different sensations, but you’ll get a better idea of how the toy works during actual use.
  • If you live near a sex shop, it is a good idea to browse it in person. You’ll be able to check out some of the sizes and some of the materials that you are interested in. It will put some of the toys into perspective, rather than just a bunch of numbers on a screen. If you don’t live near a shop or if you can only find a certain toy online, then check out the dimensions and features of the toy as well as read some reviews. This should help guide you.

The fun part about shopping together is that it builds excitement for the toy as well as might bring you closer together by discussing what you like or don’t like.

4. Use It Together

Once you have built up all of that excitement, use it! Of course, many toys can be used when you are solo, but there is a fun aspect of using it for the first time together – you’re discovering your purchase. There is something fun about sharing your first experience with it. Figuring out how to use it is part of the fun! If you’ve purchased an insertable toy or a masturbator-type toy, then make sure to add lubricant.

5. Keep Communicating

Just because you’re done experimenting with the toy doesn’t mean that it has to end there. You should talk about what you both liked or didn’t like, what you would maybe do differently, what you would want the toy to have differently, etc. You’re going through this and learning together, so make sure that you both get a chance to discuss the experience so next time can be even better.


The takeaway messages

The sales are about to start, and you should definitely buy sex toys. However, you shouldn’t purchase a toy FOR a partner; you should look to buy a toy WITH a partner. The communication and trust that goes into the purchase are bound to make the experience significantly better for everyone involved. Always make sure to purchase safe toy materials and have a good time! Communicate, communicate and communicate! Happy holidays and have an exhilarating shopping experience this holiday season!

Rebecca Dane is one-half of A Couple of Kinks – a sex-positive site that focuses on sex toy reviews, ‘how to’ guides and stories of their sex adventures. They are hoping to help impact the sex toy industry by focusing on safe, ethical and LGBT+ inclusive companies as well as help normalize sex and kink.

Help me and my team get to Eroticon 2017 in London!



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